Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Let the insecurities begin . . .

I am not a Marine battling for my life & my country. Nor am I someone battling cancer. I do not have to battle an abusive relationship, or drug or alcohol abuse . . . maybe an addiction to training. BUT, hey - I know I'm not the only one.

So why is it that when I get a call from a writer for the New York Times - to follow me for a story about the leadup to Ironman - I get worried that I am just a 44-year-old, plain suburban mother, married with two teenaged girls, who averages 15 miles per hour on her bike? That I feel like a pimple on an elephant's ass?

Seriously, are there not hundreds of thousands of people just like me trying to get by in life & train for an Ironman, too???

This is where the insecurity lies: that I am a nobody! Average Jane! Who would be inspired by me and my training for an Ironman?

And the answer comes to me: Perhaps other Average Janes or Joes. Perhaps some of the people I work with who think it is "insane," but who have a certain respect for me knowing what I am doing. Or maybe my daughter's friends who think I am "awesome"!

What does it all mean, Basil?

Maybe that I need to just accept it that I am signed up, gonna do the training & do my best to kick some Ironman ass!

And by "kick ass," I mean, "get to the finish line with some semblance of a huge smile on my face & try to do 'the running man' down the finish-line chute!
My daughters get really embarrassed by my dancing when I do it . . . so I thought it would be appropriate. I may just forget &/or fall on my face. We shall see.

Well, gotta get going - tons of errands - then dinner with Vit & Lola.

Much peace & love, TracerX


  1. are you letting the ny times writer follow you? are you an average jane, no. but you are an average tracy that is funny and entertaining! go along with the story and share the moments we dont want to share and have a good laugh. i only one person reads your story and gets motivated to do something then it is all well worth it!

    penelopes story:
    signed up for an ironman before doing a half! oh i'm smart!!!!!!
    got a cracked backed so i shouldn't run BUT IT DO..! determined!
    my bikes looks good so when guys stare at it i think they are checking me out! smart!


  2. yes I am letting him follow me. He is following several others as well.
    It should be fun.